Unnecessary tears

I’ve shed so many unnecessary tears

Walking blinded trusting my peers

Hurts, betrayal, lies, leaves my sheets stained

Back burdened weighed down still I won’t complain

Only if I could have listened with my mind instead of my heart

I am who I am which sets me apart

If I only had the gene to not really give a damn

Being Christ like won’t let me brush off man

Seeking good in everyone that I meet

Staying covered anointing my feet

Giving the benefit of doubt trusting in man

Accepting your word on which you stand

Allowing you to stab me in the back, slap my other cheek

Shedding more tears as I continue to repeat

Having your back leaving mine wide open

Cut my air supply gasping choking

 

Unnecessary tears

Mind filled with fears

Doubt sets in playing with my mental

Confused not focused emotionally unstable

Doubting who I am second guessing me

Spiritual agony unable to sleep

Tossing turning, turning tossing

Dazed dismayed constant whirlwind

My friend yet my enemy, my enemy yet my friend

Double-minded acquaintances as well as companions

Still I won’t listen have to see for my self

Contaminating my mental and physical health

Often taken for granted presumed to be naive

Gullible, simple, is what some think of me

Trusting in people causing turmoil and strife

Planting toxic seed in the dirt of my life

 

Unwise decisions I’ve often made

Head hanging in shame most of my latter days

Foolish thinking and actions just the same

It’s hard for me to change my credulous ways

Blinded by works of those who are mischievous

Unsuspecting of one who is perceived to be malicious

Believing in people makes me an easy target

Readiness to guide with later regrets

Debating if I should trust a constant fear

Tired of shedding unnecessary tears

 

 

©2012 Monya Williams

 

Same ole ish just a different toilet......

What kind of change is that when there is no forward movement? Life isn't going to just improve for you with out no work put in. It's like trying to open a bottle of water that you have yet to place in your hand. Just because the thought of opening the bottle of water is there doesn't mean it will happen when you don't put forth the action.
I've found myself doing such things in life when it came to bettering my life. I had the thoughts of how and what I need to do but I had yet to put forth the effort in doing so.
Too often we find ourselves motivating others and not our self. We have to learn how to find that balance in life. Without balance where lies the harmony?
If you continue to do the same thing then you will continue to get the same results. How will you every expect someone to trust you when you keep betraying them.
A double minded man is a very dangerous man.
You can never truly trust someone that doesn't know what to believe about life. Despite how close this person is to you, you have to love them with a third eye(spiritual eye).
Listening to your heart is good if it's in agreement with your mind. I chose to flush all negative ish out of my life in order for me to live a more abundant life. Choosing to walk in my purpose not your desire for me.
There comes a time in our life where we really need to use what most forget about and that's called common sense. If you are in your fifties and still don't have a clue about life then something is wrong. When will you take the time out to get understanding, wisdom and knowledge?
Lying but trying to convince someone you are telling the truth. Stealing with the goods in your hand trying to convince someone you bought those items when you don't have a job or hustle. Until you change the way you see and view life things aren't going to change.
Day in and day out you do the same thing, yet you expect a different result. That just lets me further know you are a fool, thinking foolishly.
Enough is enough it's time for us to grow and mature in life. Not continue to live in the same mediocrity mind frame. Think outside the box, dream big, think bigger, want more desire abundance. Time for a change.

Same ole ish just a different toilet......

 

 

Peace on this Journey

A few days ago I was having issues with my car. We all know that when it starts to get cold and you have an old car things tend to start going wrong. When my truck completely shut down with no power leaving me stranded on the side of the road in the dark early in the morning, my first reaction was to get stressed out. That is exactly what I did I was so stressed out I didn't know what to do the roads were dark with no lights and a chain of flying cars that seemed to not to care if they hit me. That's when I started making phone calls to my manager to tell him I wouldn't be in to work. Then I had to call for someone to come and get me which made me have to inconvenience someone else oh how that pierced my soul.
At that time all I could think about was what was wrong and not give thanks
for what was right. For instance I had the money to get my car fixed, my
manager understood and allowed me to take the day off to handle my affairs,
plus I had someone to come and get me and take me back home. To top it all
off I had someone there to take me to get what I needed for my car. How many
blessings was I overlooking because of one simple issue that really wasn't
an issue. I was able to do something about that so why was I so stressed
out?
Often we allow the day to day events to change the way we look at the world
or our lives and focus on the negative. When in all actuality we have more
to be thankful for than to grumble about. We can use every issue that arises
to give thanks for having the ability and will to overcome that in which has
happened. Today with working, raising kids, taking care of a home, looking
after our parents when do we really have any down time? Can we afford to
have down time? Most of us never take a moment to sit and just enjoy life.
Most of us feel as if we will fall behind in some area of our life we even
think about taking some time for ourselves. But the truth is the reason a
lot of things happen so we can have that brief moment to sit rest and be
still.
God can use any and everything to get you to learn to enjoy the life you
were given. The loss of a loved one can be painful but if we allow god to
guide us in this area he will show us the joyous times we had with them and
not to dwell on the fact they are no longer here. The fact you lost your job
it wasn't a coincident that happened so you can trust more in god and less
in man. When your car broke down it wasn't to stop you from living and
making sure you're able to get around but for you to sit still and listen to
what god is trying to tell you.
Once we come to realize and succumb to the will of god we then will realize
that god is our source we will be fine. God provides resources using the
things of the world to give you or help you achieve the predestined place in
life. Where we are here in this journey called life is just a pass through.
God has something bigger and better for us. And if we live according to his
will we can enjoy this journey called life.

I won't repeat myself anymore

Why should I repeat myself if there is something I don't agree with and I have said it to you on more than one occasion why should I have to keep repeating myself? Why is it so hard for people to understand if you continue to do things the same way then you will continue to get the same response. You want others to respect the way you feel yet you won't do the same in return. If every time you tell a lie and someone catches you in it what makes you think that they will take any of your words as truth. Blatant disregard for someones feelings is rude and disrespectful. Get it together and figure out just how important the people in your life are to you.

When it come to being in a fruitful relationship stop keeping the people around that will cause troubles for you in your relationship because they feel you should be with them. Learn that if those in your life that truly care for you will not do anything that will cause you and hurt, harm or pain in your life. If you allow someone to take you off the path for your blessing then that just means that you were not worthy to have them in the first place. Remember that everyone that in your life that is cheering is not cheering for your happiness. They may just be cheering for themselves for that blessed spot in your life. But what most fail to realize if its not meant for you to sit in a certain seat than even if you make it there that seat will never be comfortable.

Be thankful and know your place in life just because it looks good doesn't mean it is good for you.
Just because it's drinkable doesn't mean you should drink it. We may have the same desires but the way in which we receive them may be different.

Let sleeping dogs Lie!

What is the purpose of constantly putting your nose in every one's business?

I have witness a lot in my day about different issues that have gone on in my life and those around me. If for whatever reason an issue is too painful for an individual to handle then LEAVE IT ALONE. Why keep going on about an issue that has nothing to do with you and allowing this person to keep going through so much pain? The only way a person can heal is to forgive, move past the issue, and leave that situation alone. I understand we have friends that help us through some hard times in life but if for whatever reason to keep talking about the same situation than that is causing pain over and over again than leave it alone.
There comes a time in our lives when we must realize that there are times when we can deal with an issue then there is a time where we need to pray and ask for guidance. There are so many things in life that we can be dwelling on that is positive. Yet we allow ourselves to get caught up on the negative issues in life.
Sometimes people can think they are helping but in reality they are making things worst. Not every battle is meant to be fought or even given energy to. So when do we say enough is enough? And learn to let sleeping dogs lie......

How is it that we never want to deal with drama but we are the reason that it is forming in our lives. To keep picking at a wound will never allow for it to heal. Learning to cut ties can be a very forgiving thing and in return began a healing process. Take a stand and start to move forward and enjoy life. If the lies I told you keeps hurting you than cut me off. If I keep using you and you see that is my soul purpose than leave me alone and walk away. If all I can do is make you cry than I have no reason to be a part of your life. Hurt people do hurtful things and sometime we learn from our pain, sometimes we don't. Does the fact that I am hurting give me the right to hurt you or just act out because of my pain? I can choose to do what is right and not act out based on my emotions.
Should I allow my pain to infect those who have my best interest at heart? Or should I seek understanding to find out where I should go from here? There are so many questions in life that go unanswered and not because there isn't an answer. But because we refuse to seek the answer. Is it that we never really move past the hurt or is it that we find comfort in the pain? Dysfunction has become our friend and peace our enemy. Are we becoming a people of weakness and no longer to posses strength? Or is it that we so feeble minded that we can't see life for what it is? I say enough is enough and that we need to let sleeping dogs lie.

Its the tone of your voice that calms my raging seas
Its the gentle touch that puts my mind at ease
Its the sparkle in your eyes that shines the light to your soul
Its the curve of your smile that speaks to my soul

Put your hand in my hand as we walk this life together
For better or worst but love make the worst things better
The truth in your honestly
Opens the doors to greater respect for thee

Thoughts on Change

Do you believe that people can change?
As I sit back and reflect on my life and look at where I had come from I can honestly say I am a changed woman. I made up in my mind that I wanted to change the person that I saw in the mirror and that is what I decided to do. Most say they want to change but the change is just a temporary fix and not that lifetime thing in which they claimed to desire. I've made many mistakes along this journey called life and some I had regrets about most I've learned many lessons from.

So if it is that I was able to change should I doubt the fact that others have made those same changes in their lives as well. Does that make me a hypocrite because of the doubt of the changes others make in their lives? Should I believe it when someone tells me that they have changed even though most people don't do as they say but show you what it is that you want to see and hear. Is it possible for a liar to stop lying or a thief to stop stealing or maybe a killer to stop killing?

Some people change because of themselves and there are people that change for other and others that say they want to change but never make that effort to do so. No one can be who they want to be until they confront the person that they have become. Once again I say people can change if that is their hearts true desire and they want to change for the right reasons.

Just some of my thoughts on the things I be thinking......

Love,Lust or Lies

Love, lust or lies is a southern urban fiction book of romance by Jacksonville's own Monya Williams. See how the entanglement of the hearts want, desires, and needs captivates you reeling you into the pleasures of the mind, body and soul. Feel the passion for one's aspiration to love and be loved, the longing to be touched and the choices that have been made in order for these events to take place. The knowing when to let seasonal things past in order to make way for lifetime embraces.  Monya Williams captures the false realities of the misunderstanding of relationships as she personifies the truths about life and love.  Taking blinders off our eyes in order for us to see what truly is and not just what we want them to be. Let go and become captured in the journey of love lust or lies as she draws you in as if it were your story being told.

Love lust or lies by Monya Williams go out and get your copy you will be glad you did.
www.createspace.com/3636211